Is Empathy just a product nice-to-have?, Or is it at the very soul of it?
In a world of user metrics, sprint goals, and “move fast” mindsets, where does empathy fit?
As recruiters who speak to product people daily, we’ve noticed that some of the most inspiring, high-impact product leaders often share one quality. It’s not just technical savvy or commercial sharpness (though those matter too). It’s empathy.
It’s not always glaringly obvious, and certainly not something you’ll see clearly labelled on a CV, but it tends to reveal itself subtly in the questions they ask, in the time they take to listen, and in their deep curiosity about how users experience a product, not just how it performs.
But empathy can be slippery. It’s not always intuitive and doesn’t come naturally to everyone. That’s why we often point product professionals toward books. Not just because they’re informative, but because they offer space to slow down, reflect, and reframe how we think. Whether you’re in product, hiring for it, or want to understand people better, these reads are a brilliant place to start.
That’s why we care about it so much. We’re not building the products ourselves, but we are helping shape the teams that do. And while empathy rarely appears on a product job spec, we’ve seen time and again that it’s a skill well worth strengthening.
Book Summaries
1) You're Not Listening by Kate Murphy
In "You're Not Listening," Kate Murphy explores the art and importance of listening in an increasingly noisy world. She delves into why people often fail to listen effectively and the profound impact this has on relationships and understanding. Through interviews with experts and real-life anecdotes, Murphy reveals the psychological and social benefits of listening and offers practical advice on how to improve this crucial skill. The book emphasises that listening is more than just hearing words; it’s about understanding and connecting with others on a deeper level.
2) Thinking, Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman
"Thinking, Fast and Slow" by Daniel Kahneman, a Nobel laureate, is a comprehensive exploration of the dual systems that drive the way we think. Kahneman introduces System 1, the fast, intuitive, and emotional way of thinking, and System 2, the slow, deliberate, and logical approach. He explains how these systems influence our judgments and decisions, often leading to cognitive biases and errors. Through engaging narratives and groundbreaking research, Kahneman provides insights into how we can make better decisions by understanding and balancing these two modes of thinking.
3) Surrounded by Idiots (Audible) by Thomas Erikson
In "Surrounded by Idiots," Thomas Erikson uses the DISC model to explain different personality types and how they influence communication and behaviour. He categorises people into four colours: Red (dominant), Yellow (influential), Green (stable), and Blue (analytical). By understanding these personality types, readers can improve their interpersonal interactions and reduce misunderstandings. Erikson provides practical tips and humorous anecdotes to help readers navigate the complexities of human behaviour, making it a valuable guide for enhancing empathy and communication skills in both personal and professional settings.
Final Thoughts
We think that yes, empathy is at the foundation of thoughtful leadership, collaborative teams, and user-first thinking, all critical to building exceptional products.
These books are insightful, they’re approachable, practical and powerful if you're looking to learn more about the skill of empathy. Whether you’re an experienced PM, a new hire, or someone building a product team from scratch, nurturing empathy will strengthen your ability to lead with clarity and care. In the world of product design, where speed can sometimes seem to overshadow substance, we really do think empathy is a skill that deserves a mention. Because when product leaders build with empathy, they create products that drive real value to users, which means happier users and happier shareholders!
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